My Novel about Zombies Infiltrating Opus Dei and Spanish High Society

February 1, 2013

One day, a group of zombies decided to infiltrate Spanish high society. They thought it would be a good idea to join Opus Dei in order to secretly influence all levels of business and government.

“Must eat brains!” they mumbled, as they pulled on their Pedro de Hierro sweaters and went off to their jobs at Telefónica.

“Brains!” they exclaimed, as they crept up on their hapless victims in the changing rooms at the Corte Inglés.

“Eat… your… brains…” they grumbled, walking down the halls of Parliament.

zombies infiltrating opus dei
Not Madrid. This is London. But it looked sorta apocalyptic.

Years passed.

Nobody really noticed that zombies had infiltrated the Spanish elite.

They just thought their leaders were getting stupider, and blamed their political system. “There’s no viable third party,” they said. “Just these vapid grey-skinned people with patchy hair and blank expressions.”

Even the large-scale eating of Spaniards’ brains by the zombies went largely unnoticed.

Some thought Spanish people were simply getting more boring, and blamed reality TV or Belén Esteban or smartphones.

Others blamed the economic crisis. “Well, of course the brains are leaving the country. It’s called brain drain, after all! Why just last month my second cousin Fulanito went to Chile to look for work…”

Several more years passed. One zombie government was replaced by another zombie government. Some zombies were able to set up Swiss bank accounts and funnel billions out of the country.

Brains kept mysteriously disappearing.

People around the country shrugged their shoulders. “What can we do? Just wait for things to work themselves out, I guess…”

“Yeah, I guess that’s the only thing we can do… Anyway, you gonna watch the football match tonight?”

The End,

Mr Chorizo.

P.S. Calling this a novel is, of course, a huge exaggeration. It’s barely even a short story. But if you like zombies, I’ve got another article about the ebola zombie apocalypse and about the Coronavirus in Spain. Enjoy!

P.P.S. This was written a long time ago. Now we have like 9 political parties struggling to win every election. The scene is constantly changing, but let’s say that at the moment of writing this the important ones are the PP, the PSOE, Podemos, Ciudadanos, Vox, the Basque and Catalan independence parties, and probably more. The fun never ends!

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About the Author Daniel

How did I end up in Spain? Why am I still here almost 20 years later? Excellent questions. With no good answer... Anyway, at some point I became a blogger, bestselling author and contributor to Lonely Planet. So there's that. Drop me a line, I'm happy to hear from you.

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