This happened to me. For real. This morning. Here in Madrid… or at least in Vallecas.
I went to the place I’ve been going to for a few months now – mostly because my cute student works there.
Here’s what happened…
Me: Good morning, I’d like your most conservative haircut, please.
Stylist: Yes, of course. Might I ask where you are from?
Me: From the United States, sir.
Stylist: Interesting. You see, I have another American who comes in and asks for the same haircut. He says he wants to look “respectable.”
Me: Yes, indeed, sir. Many Americans aspire to someday achieve a certain level of respectability.
Stylist: A Spanish man might ask me to make him look graciosillo.
(Graciosillo might be translated as “somewhat amusing and fun.” — Ed.)
Me: Yes, sir, Spanish people do seem to be interested in this phenomenon referred to as “fun.”
Stylist: Are you sure you don’t want me to make you look fun?
Me: Yes, sir, I’m sure. The last thing I need is to be considered “fun” by my associates and contemporaries.
Stylist: As you wish… While we’re on the subject, what would you say are the differences between Americans and Spanish people?
Me: Well, if you want me to make extremely broad generalizations about hundreds of millions of people, sir, I’d say that…
(The End.)
P.S. Ok, ok, I made the generalizations he asked for, eventually. Check out these two articles: 4 things I’ve learned about American culture and also Cultural differences between Spain and the US.
P.P.S. If you’re looking for someone to chop your mop, I’ve got just a few words of warning from my friend Cassandra: The dangers of getting a haircut in Madrid.
P.P.P.S. These days I also have a stylist for my beard. But most days I just use this awesome comb and brush from Amazon. That’s an affiliate link (aren’t they all?) but I just wanted to drop that in there in case you’re into beard grooming on a high level.
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